Howdy
I’m Mary, a writer.
I’m coming to terms with writing a blog in 2025. Groundbreaking in the 2000s—something people would actually read. But here we are. SEO, work your magic.
I’ll give you a bit of this and that, no borders. You’ll find skincare that doesn’t bankrupt you, hot takes on why Wes Anderson has jumped the shark, and product opinions so honest that I should probably consult a lawyer.
I’m not a TikToker, which means I won’t overshare. And I’m not here to heal you (but Betterhealth might). I just think you deserve affordable pants that have a slow fashion lifespan, and many other treats.
Welcome. Click something. Or not. I won’t take it personally! It’s a blog, after all.
Choose Your Cruelty-Free Poison
Cruelty-free serums. Travel tips. Scary movies. Tea time. Tall-girl jeans that don’t quit at the shin. I’m here to sort what’s worth your time—and your money.
Let’s hit it.
The Tall Menu
Cruelty-Free & No Bullshit
I test the serums, moisturizers, and beauty trends so you don’t have to. Everything’s cruelty-free, and I’ll tell you when it’s a scam—or worth your cash.
Slow, Long Fashion
Secondhand, sustainable, slow-fashion, and tall-approved. These are fashion finds that go the distance—literally—without screaming sponsored.
Eat, Pray, Crash
Sure, it looks like a lifestyle blog. But scratch the goop off and you’ll find unsolicited opinions on movies, hyper-specific self-care tips, abrupt hot takes on why animals are better than people, and travel advice filtered through jet lag.